• The Management Models Pocketbook
• The Handling Resistance Pocketbook
• Brilliant Influence
• Brilliant Time Management
• Brilliant Stress Management

This is proving too complex, so I have decided to consolidate these into one blog, on my principal website at mikeclayton.co.uk.

To read blogs linked to the Brilliant Influence, please go here.

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In a paper entitled “The Mindlessness of Ostensibly Thoughtful Action: The Role of Placebic Information in Interpersonal Interaction”, Langer and her colleagues described a beautifully simple experiment.

A Simple Favour

Would you do a favour and let someone go ahead of you when you were about to use a photocopier?

The researchers asked 120 students if they could use a library photocopier first, just after the student had reached it.

The experimenter asked in three different ways:

1. “May I use the Xerox machine?”
   Giving no reason
2. “May I use the Xerox machine, because I have to make copies?”
   Giving no real reason
3. “May I use the Xerox machine, because I’m in a rush?”
   Giving a reason

The Power of “because”

When the request was a small one – the experimenter had only five sheets to copy – 9 out of 15 (60%) of the students asked obliged without hearing a reason (Request number 1). With a reason (Request Number 3), 15 out of 16 (94%) agreed.

Here’s the surprise – with no real reason (Request number 2), 14 out of 15 (93%) were prepared to oblige. The reason is clearly not important; what was important was that there was a reason – the students heard the word “because” and that was enough.

Higher stakes: Bigger “because”

Is “because” sufficient in all cases? No. When the experimenter made a bigger request, to copy 20 pages, only 6 out of 25 students (24%) obliged with both of questions 1 and 2.

With a real reason, however, 10 out of 24 students (42%) were prepared to be generous. So to agree to a significant request, we need a significant reason.

Winchester Cafe Scientifique

… takes place on the first Monday of the month, at The Bridge Patisserie, 20 Bridge Street, Winchester. Tables start filling at around 7pm and it is usually standing room only by 7:30.
The Cafe resumes, after a summer break, on 3 October, with “What can mankind do to reduce global warming?”

And here is the bonus…  It is free to attend the cafe, with just a voluntary donation to meet the organiser’s costs.

Up to date information here.

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Jim’s techniques can be summed up in seven points:

1. Build rapport.  Take an interest in the person you are talking with,
   show you like them, and listen to their point of view.  Use charm and
   flattery to enhance people’s liking for you.
2. Be clear what you want, and politely ask for it.  Negotiators should
   always ask for a final concession.
3. Be confident and stand your ground.  Keep your emotional register
   pretty flat.  This way, you come across as credible and authoritative.
4. Give the impression that you know something others don’t
   - to intimidate them from taking risks. “Don’t you think that…”
5. Give a single clear reason in support of your argument.
6. Do people favours by supporting them and by conceding minor points,
   so they owe you a favour in return. This works in negotiations and on
   a team level.  Call in those favours soon after.
7. Harness your supporters to create an alliance against anyone who
   disagrees – then isolate them.

For the full article, take a look here, or click on the image.
More Apprentice

I will be speaking at the Winchester Cafe Scientifique on Monday 4 July 7 for 7:30pm on:

The Psychology of Influence

How to get more of what you want, change minds and see promises kept

What?

• What difference can one word make, when you are in a hurry?
• Why does doing you a small favour make me more likely to do you a big one later?
• How can one question make me more likely to keep my promise?  Why was my mum right to put a premium on my title “Dr”?
• When will we stop and help a stranger and when will we walk on past?

All of these questions and more have been explored with fascinating psychology experiments over the past fifty years, which have taught us ever more about how persuasion and influence work.  In an entertaining an thought-provoking talk, I will describe some of them.

Where and when?

The talk will be around 20 minutes with plenty of time for a lively Q&A session.  The events are well attended and the coffee, tea and pastries are fabulous.  I hope you can join me at The Bridge Patisserie, 20 Bridge Street, Winchester.  Tables start filling at around 7pm and it is usually standing room only by 7:30.

And here is the bonus…  It is free to attend the cafe, with just a voluntary donation to meet the organiser’s costs.

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The interview was slanted towards the banking sector, but all of the ideas are applicable in all business and workplace contexts – and in life generally.  Rob has edited the interview into 25 minutes, in which we pack a great deal.

• The three critical areas where you need influence as a banking professional.
• How influence will help you if you want to be seen as a serious prospect for career advancement.
• Exactly what influence is and what it isn’t, and how influence can change the odds in your favour.
• Why everyone in leadership and management needs influencing skills to convince people.
• Why influence is poorly understood and how few people learn influencing skillsafter childhood.
• The power of how you look and what you say to influence others.
• Why everyone is born a great influencer.
• That influence is coachable and available to those willing to learn a few simple principles.
• Why excuses simply don’t work in taking responsibility for our influence and our communication.
• Why people are too content or too lazy to become the influential powerhousethey could be.
• The two critical ways influence has changed over the years.
• What the great influencers know and do that lesser people don’t.
• Why influence is legitimate control over people, situations and outcomes.
• That bankers who can influence simply stack the odds and give themselves an edge.
• Why ‘context‘ is key in influencing others.
• The easiest way ever of influencing someone.
• Why influencers are great at ’reading people’.
• Great ways to build credibility with those you want to influence.
• The ‘your Doctor would tell you’ principle of expert status to make people act the way you want them to.
• Why you must ‘look the part’ for more influence.
• The power of obligation and giving gifts to induce the actions you desire.
• The power of your spoken and written communications to win trust and gain influence.

Listen to our interview here.

If you can’t see or use the sound cloud player, then just click here.

And before you say: “but most people read all of their emails” consider this: have you ever accidentally skipped an email on a busy day and not found it until you tidied your inbox days or weeks later?  I know I have.  Your subject line needs to grab my attention and compel me to open it.

Here are some tips:

1. Make it clear who the email is from – especially if your email address will be unfamiliar to me
2. Keep it brief – but not at the cost of obscuring the message.  Your subject must let me know what your message is about
3. If it’s urgent say so  – but only if it really is.  If you get a reputation (which will stick after one or two slips) for claiming fake urgency, you’ll never lose it
4. Hyperbole (grossly exaggerated statements) will make your email look like spam
5. “Show me the money” – use your subject line to demonstrate why I should read your email
6. … or at least get me curious

and finally:

7.    Write it so it means something to me – rather than to you

I thought of writing this when I got an email from someone whose name I did not recognise, with my home address as the subject line.  I immediately sniffed spam or phishing.  Actually it was neither: it was a quotation for some repair work that we need and I was waiting for it.  To the administrator in the office, my address made it easy to file her email to me.  To me, it failed to tell me who it was from, what it contained, why I should read it – or even trust it, or how urgent it was (very).

As I took it from my wallet, I momentarily brought out the wrong one and I compared the two cards.

One had nine boxes when I got it: the other had ten.  Both schemes work the same way: Collect a stamp with each tea, coffee or juice, and when the card is full, trade it in for a free drink.

One card had ten stamps to collect and the other had only nine…

Until I looked carefully, because then I noticed a difference – which makes a big difference to the psychology.

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On the card with ten boxes, the first box was pre-stamped.  So, when I got my first paid stamp, I already had 2 out of 10 – or one fifth of the stamps.  With the other, when I first got a stamp, I had one out of nine – a far smaller proportion.

With both cards, one paid stamp leaves eight to get and two paid stamps leaves seven…  But the second card is the more effective.

Advice for Coffee Shops – How to make this more effective

It is tempting to say “have twelve boxed with three pre-stamped”.  The proportions are even better – your fisrt paid stamp takes you to one third collected.  But take this too far – and you’d need research to know how far is too far – and people will see through the ruse, negating its value.

… but this will work

Rather than have the first space pre-stamped, leave it blank, but instruct the baristas or waiting staff to “do you a favour when you get your first stamp: “I’ll tell you what – I’ll give you an extra stamp because you smiled at me”.  Not only will this personal approach trump the pre-printed stamp, but it will probably earn your staff a bigger tip too!

It put me in mind of some tips I have been applying in developing my new seminar, The Three Hour MBA.

1. Your visual aids are there to aid your audience, not you.
   Design them to enhance understanding, enjoyment and memory
2. Prepare your presentation in the right order:
   - message – what you want to convey
   - story – how you want to convey it
   - content – what needs to go in
   - visuals – to best make your content understandable, memorable and enjoyable
3. Less is more
   use fewer slides, with less on them.  This will force the emphasis onto you, your narrative and how you deliver it
4. If you must use text, use big letters.  I know point sizes vary, so
   - avoid fancy fonts – go for clarity
   - for most fonts, use a point size around half the age of your oldest audience member
   This will make your slides easy to read and restrict the amount of words you try and use
5. Stunning images are memorable and create a wow factor (the latter can be good or bad)
6. Consistency and simplicity are key
   Use the same fonts, colour palette and background on every slide
7. Make diagrams as simple as possible (but not more so)
   These are the only reason to learn how to do complex builds and animation effects… so you can explain your diagram more clearly.  Otherwise, cut out all other animations and builds.  All they do is shout out “!look what I learned how to do”
8. If you must put a lot of text on your slide, give your audience time to read it before you start speaking.
   My technique is to turn to the slide and read it slowly and silently to myself.  This gives my audience a cue to do the same.  When I have finished, I will know they have too (I read slowly), so I will turn back to them.  The movement cues my audience to shift their focus back to me.
9. Bullets.  I hate bullet points.  They may be better on a slide than lots of text, but are still on most presenters’ slides to remind them what to say.  Here’s a challenge: do away with them!
10. Never, never, never use a PowerPoint deck to brief for an important and complex decision.
    It is the wrong medium.  It encourages simplification (which is inappropriate) and discourages questioning (which is inexcusable).

This is a pretty familiar saying and certainly one you can rely upon when trying to influence others.  However, there is another version that is equally true, but less familiar.

“People like people who are like they want to be”

The first version works on the “I’m gorgeous, fly me” principle.  We are influenced by the people we like and we like people who are like us, because, being like us, they must be “okay”.

The second version is a powerful influencer for a different reason.  It works on the “your doctor would tell you to” principle.  We are influenced by people who are like we want to be, because they are obviously a little ahead of us in whatever aspiration we have, and therefore have a measure of real credibility.  And, of course, they clearly have got to where we want to be, so must have made a choice that is “okay”.

Notice that, for some people, this will fail if the gap between them and the person trying to influence them is too great.  “You may be where I want to be, but you’re so far ahead of me that we clearly don’t have anything in common” they would think.  There may even be some jealousy.

The practical tip

Either match dress/status style of the person you want to influence,
or dress half a notch above them.

New Scientist reports that Cancer Research UK has decided to accept that it will not be top of the search rankings when people search for information on cancer.  But rather than allow people to get unclear, confused, partial or incorrect information, they have developed a new strategy, and it’s a brilliant way to influence the world.

Number 1 on many English language searches – whether for “cancer” or for various forms of the disease or its treatments is an influential website called Wikipedia.  So Cancer Research has decided that, if it can’t beat Wikipedia, it will make sure that the information it holds is accurate and clear.  It has charged its own experts with joining Wikipedians and cleaning up the entries.

A while ago there was some research showing Wikipedia to be about as reliable on science entries as a top printed, edited encyclopaedia with expert contributors.  Now, it seems we’ll get the best of both worlds: absolutely up-to-date, with expert-reviewed content.  Brilliant.